The movies. The movies have been a part of my life for as long as I can remember. I don’t remember the first movie I ever watched or possibly how terrible it was, but I do remember the first film I had ever seen in a theater. My father took me to see A Bug’s Life when I was four years old and I still indeed remember it; getting the tickets, the smell of popcorn as you walked through the doors, seeing all the magnificent poster banners for upcoming movies hanging on the walls, the darkness as you head down the hallway toward your theater. I remember the experience as if it were yesterday. However, when the lights go dim and the screen takes shape as the top is lowered to project the massive green MPAA splash on the screen - that is when you are at the movies. It is not a process, or even an experience for that matter. The movies are an adventure, an event, a struggle, a realization, a way to be told a story, or have a point be made to you. The movies are my life and nothing is going to change that.
I had no idea what I was getting into two-and-a-half years ago when the idea hit me like a brick wall, watching an interview with a critic I had been a fan of for some time. The interviewer asked something along the lines of, “It’s everybody’s dream job to either get paid to play video games or watch movies, how does someone get that job?” That was it. I sat there wide eyed, with ideas running through my mind. I knew more than others about movies, it’s what I love, so why not do that?! I finally knew what I wanted to do with my life, so I started doing just that. I created Flubs out of pure love for the art of film, it was never anything else and I will swear to that until my dying days. I created a blogger account, started putting things together, and it would be as ready as it would ever become. My first review was Rango (look at my progression) and that would be the film that changed everything for me. I adored it, but because of seeing just one good movie, that wasn't why I continued writing; I put out reviews every week because I felt accomplished and loved what I was doing. It was literally an addiction to keep putting out content.
Of course, like anything, doing something you love has its ups and downs. Moments became hassles, as I felt no one was listening to what I had to say and it felt more like a job without pay than a hobby. But in the end, I stuck with it. I had taken time off a couple of times, but I came back with the best of my ability to tell you what to see and not see. I was lucky enough to be published as a technical one-time playwright (I won’t get into that) and in my high school paper, which only showed me that people were indeed listening, whether they agreed or disagreed was beyond the point. I only cared that people were noticing what I had to say and that was when I knew this was something I was doing right. I realized that I had a voice.
So I kept at it, writing reviews every weekend; getting better and better. Flubs was my baby that kept on growing. I knew one day I would have to say goodbye to it, but I never thought it would be this soon. I have been offered to write for The Cinematic Katzenjammer full-time and without any hesitation, I took it. I've been following the site for a while now, guest posting a review, guesting on their podcast, and they introduced me the LAMB blogging network that really helped me branch out and get more of a following from people who do the same as me. I love everything that they are doing, and they were kind enough to take me in as their trailer talker. I love the whole lot of them, making new friends who share the same interests is like nothing I had ever imagined. Now, it’s time to go a step further. If you think that my writing of reviews is going to stop, you’re wrong. I will be writing reviews for The Cine Katz as well as Trailer Parks as frequently as possible (all the time), I just won’t be writing for Flubs anymore.
Now, I’m writing this farewell because of two reasons. The first being: I want to thank those who have supported me through years of writing. You mean 100% everything to me, that is without a doubt. I would not be here if it weren't for you readers and followers of my work. Words cannot honestly express my love for you guys and all your positive and even negative comments. You believed in me, you saw something in me that sometimes even I didn't see, because you cared. You know who you are, and I thank you.
My other reason for this letter is because I feel I need to make something clear. I try not to get overly sentimental, especially about something that doesn't respond back or have feelings, but Flubs isn't just my writing, or my opinions. Flubs is me. And it is a part of me I have to now let go, just like everything we experience in life. I look at Flubs not like a body of work, but of my art about art. I watched movies as an escape, and wrote about them because writing is what I always wanted to do. I created Flubs as a safe haven for my ideas and opinions on what certain people were trying to say; what they were trying to tell the audience. And now I’m telling you, we all need a safe haven. Everybody is flawed, we all have our problems, but within those problems we need somewhere to go to get away from that. Flubs was my safe haven and now I’m letting it go, because I've faced my fears. I've learned and grown, and now am left to leave a new legacy somewhere else. That doesn't mean I’m leaving you guys, or you won’t be able to read what I have to say anymore, but that I’m starting a new chapter and am incredibly grateful that everyone at The Cinematic Katzenjammer is giving me an opportunity to do that. For the first time in my entire life I am not afraid of change, in fact, I welcome it.
I will find a way to preserve my reviews in a database so that they will always be there for those who need my opinion, but as of this week, Flubs will certainly be laid to rest. No sequel, no reboot, but to be held in your memories. As it will be in mine.
Thank you all for everything you have given me, I am eternally grateful.